I am not a “daily” person and that’s okay.

Photo by Tirachard Kumtanom on Pexels.com

I say this as I sit here 9 days into my marriage, a little bit disappointed. The original intent to document daily love letters to my beautiful bride for the next 365 days but my body had other plans. The day after our nuptials (more about those later) I got sick. My body’s adrenaline plummeted to what I can only imagine was my frozen chest from the outdoor photos from the day prior and I ended up with a bacterial sinus infection. I’m still groggy as hell from it, even a week on medication. Enter, family problems. Without going into explicit detail to protect the privacy of my new sister-in-law we had quite a scare a few days later. Life has since calmed down from the chaotic pace but not without repercussions to relationships both new and old. Needless to say, the first week of my marriage if we’re being honest sucked. Now I’m stuck with this sensational idea I created in my head on a high from being in love and newly engaged and it seems like walking uphill on a treadmill now.

Does it mean I love my wife any less because I don’t want to write her daily chronicles of our lives together? No, it doesn’t. She’s lived them with me from her own lense but the guilt popped in slightly. I’m a writer and I set the expectations of my self-expression very high, and my feelings rank at the top of the totem pole, so it’s a bit of a let down to fall on my face like this. However, despite the hot garbage pile that’s happened this week I have woken up every single day to same beautiful woman who keeps me company, gets me whatever I need when I feel like butt, who tries to maintain the house the way that I like it to make me happy when I’m down, and the same woman regardless of all the shit we dealt with this week still found ways to laugh and be present with me. (HA HA Take that Disney Plus, you’re only a mere tool for love!) 

(Copyright 2016 – Patken Photography)

I have tried daily things. As bloggers and any internet influence really, daily schedules feel like the only option to achieve some sort of relevancy in a world where you could be forgotten at the click of a button. However, daily doesn’t always work for everybody and I’m starting to come to terms with the idea that it’s just not for me. Life gets busy, I get lazy, or I would rather be doing something in real life versus being a slave to a schedule. So daily, I think this is my way of breaking up with you. We’ve tried, it’s not you, it’s mostly definitely me and that’s just going to have to be the way it is.

5 thoughts on “I am not a “daily” person and that’s okay.

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  1. I don’t think you need to be a daily blogger to be relevant. So long as you’re relatable, authentic and provide something incredible (for instance your letters of love) then post them once a week if that’s better. You’ll still find your tribe!

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    1. Thank you, V! I think I might try that. The letters were more for journaling first and then eventual publishing but I’ve also struggled with this on the blogging level too so it was a humbling moment all around. I appreciate the encouragement though! 🙂

      Like

  2. You are an amazing writer! Yes you both have had a tough week, but please remember this . The good always out weighs the bad.

    Love your #1 fan😘😜

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’m sorry to hear that you’ve not had the best start to married life. I had a thought the other day – we spend too much time striving and celebrating perfection and not enough time appreciating real life.

    The start of your marriage may not have been the idyllic scene you had envisioned but it was real life. You were there to support each other through the tough time and that alone shows your love ☺️

    Liked by 1 person

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